Tired of the monitor reflecting off my glasses

Kind of a blah day here, so not really coming up with the funny. For those who might have been offended/insulted by yesterday, I was trying to bring the funny, but I'm not sure that came across. Too much snark, perhaps. So to be clear, y'all are delightful and intelligent people, even when the testosterone is poisoning your brains. (Just can't stop, can I?)

One thing I didn't mention yesterday was that due to some Twitter activity I got another bump in donations. So many thanks to you people, and the boobs thank you too. And I don't mean the other participants in this contest, though they probably do as well. (And there I go again. Oh well, it's how I roll.)

You see what I did with that opening paragraph there?

A day passes, and everyone's at each other's throats...

As you can see, I am somewhat shorn. I did this before all the kerfuffle, but I probably would have done it anyway, were it after. I shall express my opinion on this by use of analogy -- which as you'll see I might think is necessary rather than straight logic.

Say you're playing football. Most would agree that this is a manly sport. Most would also agree that running the ball is more manly than throwing a pass. However, both are allowed in the rules of the game. If you decide to go the manly route and run the ball all the time, you will lose more likely than not. You are turning down opportunities that the rules offer you, and you are paying the price.

The situation is similar here. Prior to entering the field of contest, the rules were agreed upon by all. Gamesmanship requires that they be used.

So to be plain -- not making use of a rule that is of advantage to you may well be manliness. But it's also stupidity.

You lookin' at me?

So here it is Day 8, and Cmar continues to dominate the charts with his fundraising prowess. I have decided that this is not because of his vast connections through the Interweb, nor because of his overwhelming charm and personality, but because of "The Stare." People see his photos and have an overwhelming urge to empty their wallets, if only to make it stop, make him look away, the eyes, the eyes, for God's sake just close that browser!

So here is my contribution to the "I'm a muppet/prosthetic-headed monstrosity/staring fiend" photographic oeuvre. Hopefully it will inspire you to do the right thing.

Isn't spring the time for ferns?

I think all the Miracle-Gro I've been drinking is starting to have an unexpected result (the daily trips to Poison Control, on the other hand, are completely expected). As you can see from this picture, I'm starting to grow strange green ferns out of my shoulders. They also seem to have a soporific effect on me, as I can barely keep my eyes open.

I will continue to document this odd behavior if I can. I fear, however, that I will end up like Stephen King in Creepshow. As the planet may be at stake, I heartily urge my friends and family to bringeth forth the napalm and Agent Orange, and don't spare the Roundup.

It's behind me, isn't it?

As I believe you can see from this picture, I have achieved the fuzzy. The cheeks are lagging a bit behind the neck and chin, but that will come in time. Soon I will be simply hairy, like bear.

No, not that bear. Russian bear. Or in my case, half-Polish bear. Bring on the potato vodka. Tak.

Evil first, then pie

Here you see me in my usual pose at work¹: Deep in concentration, making the games that all the kids love. The other advantage of this pose is it shows off the beard progress reasonably well. Unfortunately the pinhole camera on my MacBook does a poor job of showing off its glorious nature, but believe me, it's there.

The itchiness on the neck is getting progressively worse. My understanding is that trimming the cervical region is legal, but I will give it at least another week before cleaning up that area. By then it'll probably require a machete.

¹ Yeah, this picture was taken at home. But you get the idea.

If you take the indefinite integral of 1/Cabin dCabin...

I'd like to say that this is how I normally look, what with the thoughtful pose and all, but in truth I'm really wondering what will happen if I keep pulling on my chin. Will it come off? And if it does, will the rest of my face fall apart, like Schwarzenegger's disguise in Total Recall? Further testing will be required, I suspect.

No, there was no whisky -- or gin -- involved. Why do you ask?

Rub, rub here, Rub, rub there, Whether you're tin or brass...

Finally up to the apogee of about #50 grit. From here on out it's increased length and silky softness. And while I have some abrasiveness, I might as well make use of it. Here I am helping out with the dishes...

Speaking of helping, I want to join the chorus and thank those who have already donated, and for their very generous support of my beard and in particular cancer research. I probably would have engaged in this silliness -- er, manly contest of testosterone -- anyway, but this cause and your support of it makes it a lot more worthwhile.

As for the rest of you... cough up the dough, Mac. We gots lives to save with our stubble.

After liberal application of Miracle-Gro(tm Scotts/Monsanto), my chin is now starting to show some progress. I believe I'm up to about #100 grit. The itchiness is already beginning, which is a lovely feeling, let me tell you.

Since most of the pictures on the site are looking grim and gritty(tm DC Comics) I thought I would lighten the mood a bit by actually smiling. Gruesome!

Youthful and Determined

Just to establish my bona fides, here is my baby-faced self as of this morning. The actual shaving process occurred at 4pm yesterday, so as to provide an equal starting point against the nefarious Dr. Cmaaarrr.

The result this morning is... disappointing. I would estimate the scruffiness as about a #300 grit, sufficient to smooth out a rough spot, but hardly industrial abrasiveness. Clearly I am out of practice. Time to go do some chin-ups and lip curls.